As I am moving forward on my path, keep hitting these waves of resistance. It’s a wonderful path, but it’s bigger than anything I have ever done before. I am right at the edge of my own growth and it’s scary. Thrilling. Terrifying. Exciting.
For me it’s big stuff. Book coming out soon. New Reiki classes. Book launch and a road trip to California. I am out on the skinny branches of the tree. It’s all good and it’s all on the hairy edge of my comfort zone.
Today a pile of challenging and chewy tasks faced me- a real mouthful. Deadlines. Projects. Big ones with a lot riding on them. I could feel this stiff resistance in me, like someone turned up gravity by a few degrees. The urge to lie down on the couch and watch comforting old movies was strong. Surely a nap at 9am on a Saturday is totally fine, right? Maybe that pesky junk drawer in the kitchen needs cleaning out before I do any of those big scary things. If I am lucky someone I know will have a big, gnarly crisis I can throw myself into because they really need me, yes?
I am not exactly sure what the resistance is. Most of it feels internal. It’s a quantum leap for me, a huge level up. It will put me in the public eye and on a bigger stage. And that is already happening. I am rather shy and introverted person truthfully, and sensitive. What if there are trolls and haters? What if people don’t like my book? In some places they burn people like me at the stake. Or at least stone us in the village square. Although of course, there is now the social media equivalent of that. It’s a scary new world for a sensitive type like me.
And there is also this odd external resistance that I can’t quite figure out. When we shine our light into the world, do the forces of Darkness notice and take a stand against us? I don’t know but it sure feels that way.
I pray a little and then push myself through the heavy gravity around the couch and sit down to work. (yay me…) And almost right away, I feel like a have broken a barrier and the light comes through. Good things start happening almost instantly.
One new project is done, before time and under cost.
There is a juicy invitation to speak somewhere wonderful that has come out of the blue.
People show up asking how they can help, offering encouragement and support.
A friend offers a powerful and timely connection to just the right person I need to speak to.
Money comes out of nowhere and just in time and in the right amount.
It feels to me like I am on the path of my soul’s work here and my commitment to overcoming the resistance opens the doors for me. The couch will still be there for me, waiting for when I need a break, but for now I am in the flow.
Thanks be.
